Apr. 4th, 2006

Sick...

Apr. 4th, 2006 02:04 am
sherryillk: (Default)
I feel miserable, I'm tired, I'm stuffed up (and remarkably, I have a runny nose which to me is a conundrum in itself), I'm coughing up a lung ever five seconds and I really wish I were at home being pampered by my parents.

Obviously, it's the first time I've gotten sick while being at college. I really want someone to baby me now and I really wish this wasn't during my MolecCell final week. I'm barely awake to study so I can't even conceive how I'm going to get a passable grade this week.

As it is, the electron transport chain is wickedly difficult and way more confusing than I thought it was. I'm getting the point where I'm losing my protons and electrons... I know it starts off with NADH, if you want to start with complex I, the NADH-CoQ reductase (it's a reductase, right???), which for every 2 electrons passed onto to CoQ to make CoQH2 passes 4 protons from the matrix to the inner membrane space. Or was it the other way around....? It's so confusing and I swear my textbook doesn't help at all (it's like graduate level biochem and I'm just a little sophomore trying to read it -- I don't know why since my prof told us it was graduate level biochem and way difficult as it is but I tried and now I'm more confused than ever). Thankfully, everything else makes sense. At least I think I understand glycolysis (always the easiest of them all), the Kreb Cycle (yay for citrate!), and oxidative phosphorlyation (thank god for the familiar ATPases!). Pyruvate dehydrogenase is a bit iffy because I've always thought of it was part of the Kreb Cycle but it really isn't so I have to kinda seperate it in my mind. It's simply pyruvate converted to acetyl CoA to feed into the Kreb Cycle. It's so elementary and short that it seems like it should be part of the Kreb Cycle, you know?

Anyway, enough bio talk! It's 2 AM, I slept from 9 PM to midnight so I'm desperately trying to study now with some sleep in me.

I got sick yesterday and was basically out. I got through one lecture, which was good, but it was also bad because I meant to go through at least two. It wasn't happening. Today, was hell. Absolute hell. I can't imagine how tomorrow will be since I have lab and it might top today's hell but I really doubt it.

My lowest point in the day? After room selection, we were waiting at the corner at the bus stop and it starts to rain. If I wasn't going to get sicker before, that would have clenched it then. It was pretty hard too, which might explain why I have a terrible little headache right in between my eyes right now.

I need cough drops. It's an evil dry cough (which is bad according to Masha) and I'm scared that it'll go the way of all my other coughs the last couple of years -- linger for several months before finally letting go. It's bad enough that I have allergies which make me cough anyway but it seems like when I get sick like this, the coughing just says with me forever and forever.

I really want to skip tomorrow. But I can't. God, I wish I were at home, as a little kid where I could stay at home from school and my parents would run around crazy, trying to make me feel better when really they can't cure my illness but try anyway. :(

I miss those days... :(

In other news, I'm going to try and read "Kafka on the Shore," by Murakami, the English version since obviously I can't read Japanese (it was originally published in Japanese, right?) this weekend after my exam and it's less than two weeks before Kimeru's CD and DVD are out -- both of which, I'm buy. And I'm getting 5566's VCD + CD release as well so I'm happy about that. I really do love 5566. My only consolation for all of this is stuff. I'm getting a lot of stuff. Yay.

I'd trade it all for getting better though. Preferably tomorrow. I wake up and I'm good. I doubt it though. I'm not resting my body enough, I don't get enough sleep, I barely eat and when I do, it's not very balanced, I'm not keeping myself hydrated (I'm so dry right now but I really don't want to drink or eat anything right now), it's cold outside and wet, and I was left standing in the rain for twenty minutes today. Yeah, I'm so taking care of myself.

And I've run out of tissues too...

:(

Out of it

Apr. 4th, 2006 11:33 am
sherryillk: (Default)
I'm so out of it today... I was kinda beady-eyed during Japanese as I squinted to read the katakana words ("designer suits" threw me so badly) and I tried to stay focused through the entire class but it just wasn't happening. Neither did it work during Orgo -- I just kept on going in and out when it came to that. All I want to do right now is to go to Kimmel, find a nice little corner to snuggle up in and fall asleep until I have lab at 1:30. Which I could if I ever could finish print out all these evil Sounds papers. I hate how he does them in such a high resolution because they're so hard to print. It's annoying as hell.

It's like my brain is covered with a fog. I hate being sick. I really do. And this weather just makes it worse and worse... I walk out and I'm hit with a wall of cold wind. You'd think that being April, it'll be warmer but no, it's rather cool still and it's annoying me so much.

Right now I just want to wrap myself in lots of good thoughts and feelings (negative vibes make me go ugh...), crawl up in bed with a ton of covers (although with the way I'm feeling, I alternate being really really hot and really really cold) and just chill for the next couple of days.

If I could, I would skip lab because that is probably the most evilest thing out there for me right now. I don't want to go and do it because I'll probably mess up again and end up screwing myself over. I have to make an Aldol product today. And hopefully it's a solid because I don't know how long it's gonna take me to do the Aldol, the TLC and then run a column if it turns out that it's a liquid product. And I must have next week free to run extra tests just in case. Last week is the last week of lab so... Eep..!

I can't deal with this... There's just too much I need to do in such a short period of time and I hate having to do stuff, scheduling things into my schedule and having to make time for them. It just makes me unhappy. :(

Tonight is...finish two lectures (preferably two and a half) and read the corresponding text for those two lectures. Tomorrow... I think I'll skip recitation since it's there's no quiz and try and do three lectures tomorrow. Thursday, also skip that recitation, and go and do recitation math problems in preperation for the test. Hopefully, I'll be better by then...

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