(no subject)

I stopped watching the ontd_glee community just now. I've never really liked it, never saw the need to join it. Although with the mods being the way they are, I get the feeling I would probably be denied admission because I'm a Blaine fan and because one of them thought I called her a racist when I questioned why someone would use appearance as the number one reason why they hated Darren Criss in a previous post of mine. Hate his singing (I sometimes agree), hate his acting (agree most of the time), hate the fact that he's overshadowing other original cast members (don't mind, he's the only reason why I really engage in Glee), those are perfectly valid reasons to dislike Darren. But physical appearance is a horrible thing to be hated for, and having been bullied for my appearance all through high school, it's not something I could ever be okay with. And they even mocked me on Twitter, so I guess I should be glad I made a blip in their world? *shrugs*

Anyway, it's hard being a Blaine fan, even a silent lurking Blaine fan who has no posting or comment privileges there. Suffice to say, I dislike their entire environment, but they seem to take being an ontd off-shoot to mean they could be horrible human beings online all the time. Personally, I don't get how people with such capacity for blind and ruthless hate (which they may not even truly believe in or mean, they simply do it for amusement purposes, even worse in my opinion since they don't even have the decency to own what they believe in) could claim they're still good people in real life, but it's not my conscience they have assuage. I might not get it but it's not like I'm going to tell them to stop doing it or having their fun. I disapprove, yeah, but what does my opinion matter? It really doesn't.

But I've kept following them because no other community is as fast at posting media news about Glee. So they were useful so I weighed that with the fact that I hated myself for even being a small part of their community. It felt like enabling, which is stupid since I wasn't a member but it felt like I was still in association with the community anyway.

Eventually, there are only so many lines that can be crossed that you just can't justify it to yourself anymore. Sure, saying that Darren Criss is fucking Ryan Murphy is horribly crass, and all that crap they say about Darren, justified or not, like how only his mother can love him, that stuff didn't bother me as much as a post that called a teenage girl on Tumblr "some dumb bitch." Like it or not, Darren is a person in the media and in the entertainment industry so he has opened himself to mass mocking and hatred from the public on some level. Arguably, he has given up a measure of privacy for his success. However, this fan of his, has not. I'm not really sure an adult calling out a child online, on a community with over 8,000 members and countless followers, is really something I can even be marginally associated with. I really don't think being a fan of Blaine and of Darren's means you're automatically opened to open derision.

And she even said "banning myself for this whole post/personal attack" as a joke comment on the post so even she's aware of the fact that it crossed some lines. But apparently these lines on ontd_glee don't matter since she follows it with "jk it doesn't count if they're from tumblr LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL." This just made me more uncomfortable than anything else that has ever been said about Darren, which is a feat I previously thought wasn't possible.

So no more following of ontd_glee. I'm not that interested in media about Glee anyway, and since I've decided to stop seeking spoilers out, it's not like I use it that much nowadays. They're usually very one note anyway. I used to like them to counterbalance all the Blaine and Klaine love I get from kurt_blaine, which is mindless and one note in a different way but at least they don't hate.

There's a lot not to be liked about Blaine fans. And of Darren fans. They make me embarrassed to be one half the time so it's not like I don't get it. A few, very vocal fans have made it hard to be part of the saner branch of his fanbase. But I really don't want to see them being singled out for what amounts to their teenage celebrity crush. Or an invitation to others to hate on them for it either. I can't help but wonder about how I would have felt a decade earlier, if this had happened to me because I was insanely into Kimeru (and I was back then, I was crazy insane about him) and then had a horde of people invited to mock me because of it. With my state of mind back then, I doubt it would have been pretty. The poster even linked the Tumblr post that got her so upset, so now people can easily go and flood her askbox with hate.

I was never very suited for that sort of community anyway. I'm too sensitive, too easily offended and I lack a sense of humor so it's hard for me to tell when people are joking or not. I probably will never understand the purpose of being senselessly negative so it was never a good fit for me. And now it's gone from my flist. Good riddance.